Decisions

We all face challenges in our life. Every single day. Big challenges, small challenges..their always there & their always happening. Weather your deciding to let your daughter go on her first date, take the trash out or let it sit, or deciding to keep your husband on or off life support..we are always trying to decide on whats best. Sometimes we know whats best, sometimes we choose the easy way out.

But sometimes, sometimes you have to make a really tragic decision that rocks your world to the freaking core. Your decision haunts you for days, weeks, months, years..you wonder if you'll ever move on and if you can really ever be the person you once were before the huge decision making took place.

I get so caught up thinking about things like this..and it really just blows my mind. The things we do, and the way it effects us. I feel like life is such a bitch sometimes and no matter what you do you just end up miserable and never satisfied.

Life is really hard sometimes. Reality sucks, and you just might never be able to wrap your mind around certain decisions you've made. But most of the time? Most of the time its amazing, and most of the time theres a million other little things that make up for the crappy ones.

There is one little person in my life who is constantly influencing every single decision I make. She makes me think twice as hard, she makes me do the right thing, and she makes me smile 10 times bigger.

Theres also a bigger person who just never seems to let me down. Even times of sadness when I think he has actually let me down - he always just pops back up to prove me wrong. He is my backbone, my friend when no one else is there, my soul mate, my "tough skin" when mine is too soft to handle certain things, and my sanity. Together we created such a beautiful little miracle who keeps changing our lives every day.

Someday, I'll get married. Someday I'll finish school, and someday I'll own a house. But for now? We're doing just fine doing what were doing and I feel no need to prove that to anyone.

Needless to say - I've been going through some crap lately. Sorry I've been missing - I'm back. I am okay, and I am moving on from everything that I have been through, the best way that I know how. I may never be the same person again - but that's okay. I have learned, I have grown, and I am ready to deal with whatever life throws at me next.

October was just as glorious as I hoped it would have been. We celebrated fall at all costs & went out with a bang on Halloween when Abby acted like Ms. queen Bee and crossed her arms in the wagon & refused to talk to anyone. Her cousin Dillon went up to every house & with two buckets and said "Trick or treat! This one is for my cousin..she's the grumpy one in the wagon" She sure is a lucky little girl!

Now we're ready for the Holidays, and you better believe I'll be here posting away about them. My heart pitter patters at every sight and thought of Christmas & all the joy that comes along with it. I seriously got way too excited over the new Christmas decoration display at Wal-mart tonight and totally played its beginning to look a lot like Christmas when we got home & sorted through all the Christmas stuff we own. Yes, I am a holiday junkie. I have admitted this before.

Here's what we've been up to the past month: