I will be back.

Well its no secret that I've been MIA from my blog lately. Theres been some big changes and a lot of new beginnings coming my way that I just haven't been comfortable sharing with my blog yet. Plus, I still haven't gotten my dream camera and my dumb little one is broken, I have a hard time getting inspired to blog when I have no photos - that will be changing very soon.

I've been thinking long and hard and I really want to come back to blogging. I throughly enjoy it and I absolutely love the fact that I have such special documents of mine and Abby's life as were rolling with punches and taking things day by day. So, I want to come back. But where do I start?

I am moving to Middle River in 29 days (but who's counting?). Middle River is about 25 minutes from my hometown and not very close to friends or family. I am nervous about it, but I also feel that its the best option for me and Abby right now. Without going into too much detail about my personal life, Jackie is going to be our new roomie in Middle River. We are excited and I think that this is going to be a good thing for all of us in the long run.

Jackie because 1) She is my best friend in this whole world, and probably my only friend I could ever imagine living with. 2) She is Abby's godmother, and they both absolutely adore each other. Anddd thats pretty much enough of a reason right there, I think anyways. I think this is a good thing, I constantly have to keep reminding myself of this. I'm doing the right thing. I'm doing the right thing. I'm doing the right thing.

I never imagined myself being a single mother, but I guess no one really does. I am very confident that we will be fine, and that things will work themselves out, one way or another. This is going to give me time to focus on making myself and my daughter happy, and taking school more seriously.

I'm not stressed out for the first time in months. I feel very at peace with my decisions and happy that I'm walking away from a negative thing in my life. The fact that I'm going to have to give up my precious baby every other weekend is a knife in the heart, but I'll be okay. We will all be okay.

I will be back for good soon. I promise.

Its been awhile.

Its been awhile...so I figured I'd stop in and say hey to my little old blog. I am majorly slacking on updates and photos..sorry. The good news is I am only a few short weeks away from getting my dream camera. I will be back full on and ready to unleash a whole 20 years of creativity that has been building up!

Until then? Its Friday night. I just got home from work. I'm in an old Phillie's tee and pink fuzzy slippers, under the electric blanket and listening to Jake flip back and forth between Alaska: gold rush and Top shot. He's actually now poking his toes into my ribs, cocking his head to the side saying "Wanna get a movie when this show is over?"

What else can I say? Its been the same old same old around here. Abby and I are having a serious case of cabin fever - we are so ready for spring. Theres only so much you can do when its bitterly cold outside, and walking around the mall and playing in its play area is getting a little old. We're ready for some playground trips, open toed shoes, and day trips to the beach. Its supposed to be in the 50's this weekend, which gives us a teeny tiny light at the end of this freezing tunnel.

We are getting out this weekend and doing something fun. What you ask? I have no idea. But I am SICK of this apartment and I'm sure Abby is too. Maybe I'll go on a hunt and get some pictures too.

Hopefully I'll be out of this cold weather rut soon!!

Happy weekending.

Everything happens for a reason.

I'm almost positive that I have this spell casted on me. One of those evil/good ones. You know, the kind that brings you HORRIBLE luck and you hate the spell forever..until the end you finally realize that you love the spell. You love it because it pushed you to work harder, love deeper, and learn to be more independent than you would have been if things had gone simply. When its all done and over and you see the spell in the corner of the room giving you this bitter smile like its okay, I know. You don't have to thank me.

I'm in a rut of bad luck. I'm convinced that its all for a reason and that some day it will all pay off and end in something beautiful.

This morning at 7:15am I was steering my car. My broken down car, and a very sleepy looking Jackie was trying to push it out of traffics way....in the middle of an ice storm. Shall I explain?

Every once in a while Jackie will come over on a Monday night when I work on Tuesday. She's always off on Tuesdays..so sometimes she'll have a sleepover here and spend the day with Ab on Tuesday morning while I'm working so that I don't have to drag her out in the cold. And because she loves her too, of course!

My morning was unusually easy. I actually had enough time to pack my lunch, make a cup of coffee, and take the extra time to shave in the shower. Well, it all went down hill quickly. Should have known! My makeup was MIA. The one god for saking morning when I had the time to scrub every last spec of makeup off my eyes and skin, I had NOTHING to re apply it with. I could have done with out most of it, but I was not about to leave the house without some concealer, my face looks like a freaking piece of pepperoni pizza without it. I was in a panic rushing around the house, calling Jake 50 times...when finally I found it hiding behind the TV in our bedroom. Why you ask? Jake put it there last night to keep Abby from destroying it. I forgot.

I was finally making it out the door when I realized there was an inch of ice on the roads. So much fun. I shuffled my way across the street to my car and after 16 tries of the turn the key, pump the breaks, and jiggle the steering wheel my car finally started. But not for long. I was backing of the parking spot when little red shut down. She said fuck this. I'm not going out in this shit.

We were in the middle of the road, blocking traffic. I tried about three times to re start her but it wasn't happening. I put my flashers on, waved sorry to the other cars who were trying to turn around, and ran up the steps to wake up my sleeping friend.

"Jackie. Jackie! JACKIE! Get up! My car broke down, your gonna have to help me push it". She got up, rubbed her eyes, checked the time, put on her glasses and said "lets go". *This one of the million reasons why she's my best friend*.

As soon as we were out front she said "Oh my god Brittany! We are never going to be able to push your car! Theres no traction, its all ice!". But needless to say, we tried. I turned the stiff wheel and she pushed with all her might on my bumper. Bitch was not moving.

We made a couple phone calls to dads/friends when finally we realized the car wasn't in neutral. Durrr Brittany and Jackie. Right at this time a good Samaritan came out of his house in his camo sweat pants and untied work boots who helped us get old bessy back in her place.

It was definitely a work out. I was definitely pissed that I had to call out of work, 10 minutes before I was supposed to be there.

But, theres always good in the bad right? Needless to say Jackie and I were *awake*. It was only 7am, we were frozen to death, and there was only one solution: The early show, my giant electric blanket, coffee, and McDonald's breakfast. We spent the whole morning that way, laughing and gossiping. It was a nice way to wind down after a hectic morning.

The sweetest part of it all? Being there when my sweet, sweet baby woke up at 11. Although she was probably really confused why Mommy already had her hair done and makeup on, her clothes for the day laid out, and breakfast waiting on the table. Ha ha. So not like me. I usually don't even see the light of day until I hear her scurrying around in her crib. We usually spend our early mornings in a very dark living room watching Sprout. I cuddle her up on the couch under blankets for awhile while I sip coffee..and then we get up and start our day. Today was pretty different.

After a sprout tv, pancake eating, and book reading late morning..nap time rolled around and today I was right there with her. I kissed her little nose and dimmed the lights..and I took the most relaxing and refreshing nap I'd taken in such a long time. Jake came home from work, got undressed, gave me a sweet kiss and fell asleep next to me - made it even better.

We stayed in for the night due to the icy conditions and Jake had to take some time to fix my car (which is all better now - thanks babe! and thank goodness for handy boyfriends!). We got pizza hut carry out, played with blocks, scrubbed the carpet and took a nice and warm bath together (me and Abby that is - not me and Jake. ha ha). Bed time rolled around and Ab had no interest in it, so instead she stayed up with Mama and watched Teen Mom 2!

She's finally in bed and I'm feeling pretty sleepy myself. G'night! #everythinghappensforareason.

Getting Better

Right its 5 in the evening. Abby is napping in a room filled with vapor steam and vicks fumes, Jake is snoring in the next bedroom over..all sprawled out across our bed. Its oddly quiet in here. The apartment is a disaster, I haven't showered, and there are dried ramen noodles from lunch stuck to the kitchen table. We also have NOTHING to make for dinner. There are so many things I could and should be doing right now. But instead? I'm stuck. Right here in my high school gym shorts under my electric blanket and cup of coffee in my hand. Snow is on the ground, its freezing..and I am lazy. It has been a long couple of days around these parts.

It all started on Thursday. We got our first big snow of the year, Jake and I were taking Abby over to my mom's house to play in the snow with her and my little brother. Right before we were about to head out I noticed that Ab's head felt slightly warm, and that she was acting a little lethargic. Decided to check her temp - 101.0. Crap. It was all down hill from there. She suddenly developed a whopping cough and became miserable. It creeped up on her out of no where. I was worried since Jake had just gotten over step throat, so we headed to our local emergency department.

After spending 3 hours cooping up in a little pediatric waiting room with four other sick kids, one of which who threw up all over the floor..we finally got a room and saw a doctor. He assured me that it was almost unheard of for kids as young as Abby to get strep throat. He diagnosed her with a common cold and encouraged us to keep up with the Motrin.

The next couple nights are a complete blur. We spent our time high off of Vicks fumes, squirting Ibuprofen every 4 hours on the dot, forcing pedialite down, walking back and forth between her bedroom and the steamy bathroom. I camped out on her bedroom floor, she slept with us..we have all been exhausted. Her cough kept getting worse and she was regularly spiking a fever. When she was sleeping you could hear her lungs rattling in her back, she was so miserable and my mommy instincts kept telling me something else was going on.

Yesterday I made her an appointment with nighttime pediatrics. Jackie came with us for moral support and to "play Daddy for the night" as she says since Jake was busy. The pediatrician there did tell me that it is unlikely for someone her age to get strep, but he went ahead and did a test anyways. He listened to her lungs and thought that she probably had developed a little bit of croup and was going to give her a shot of steroids. But guess what? The strep test came back POSITIVE. Just goes to show that mommy knows best! It was my gut feeling from the start and I should have demanded a strep test that night in the ER, but oh well..now I know.

My poor, poor girl has been so sick and its absolutely broken my heart. But with a good teaspoon of penicillin last night and a little bit of Motrin, she was already feeling 100x better. Jackie and Whitney came over last night to visit and my little miss stayed up until almost midnight playing with the girls. She slept through the night and finally got some good rest that she really, really needed.

It had been a rough couple of days but just seeing how much better Ab felt already, and having my girls over until 4am laughing and gossiping was the perfect pick me up.

They say that this is when its rough. This is when its hard and when you want to run away and cry. But honestly? It hasn't felt that way for me. Maybe I'm just super mom or something (hehe) but it just felt so normal and natural to take care of her. I knew what she needed, and I knew how to do it. My heart instantly grew two sizes when my little on the go toddler snuggled up on my chest for two hours. And when she fell asleep in my arms. And when she let me rock her. I was sad that she felt so bad, but this is just what I do. I am Mama. And Mama knows and can conquer all :)

Today has been good. Abby feels SO much better already. My Grandma stopped by to check on her today and she ran around and played and couldn't wait to show Meme all of her toys. & I just have to add that my Grandma went to sit on a stool, and totally fell off and took a doozy on Abby's bedroom floor. We both burst out with laughter, and I literally had tears running down my cheeks. Poor Abby looked traumatized. But god, I love laughing like that. Especially with my beloved Grandma.

Now? I really should shower, and I really should figure out what we're gonna eat for dinner. So, sinara for now!

Spring fever and pool partying

January is almost over. Thank god. The ending of January means that we only have one more month until our first spring month arrives, and one more month until we can move out of our apartment, hooray!

Needless to say it was freezing outside today. I am so so so so so SO ready for some warm weather. I will take 60's and breezy in a heart beat. Come on March!!

The fact that my little brother's birthday party was an indoor pool today didn't help my spring fever. It gave me a quick glimpse of summer afternoons spent at the pool, lunch out on the town, and a nice nap on cool sheets. Instead, we had to bundle up afterwards to go back outside, eat McDonald's for lunch in our warm car instead of outside on a blanket, and had to heat up the electric blankets when we got home because it was so damn cold.

Abby had so much fun though! She LOVED the baby pool. She liked to splash and then laugh about the water hitting her in the face, and kept climbing out and jumping back into my arms. She was crazy! Not scared at all. She sooo wanted to get in the big pool and pulled every single one of the party guests by the finger over to the gates in hopes of convincing one of us, lol.

Poor Jake has been under the weather today. He tagged along to the party with us but still was pretty down in the dumps. He has a fever and a yucky cough. Pretty sure he'll be home from work with us tomorrow. Hope he feels better soon!

Between all that swimming Abby and I did, and Jake's cold..we all passed out when we got home....and didn't wake up until 8:30. Jake took some Nyquil and went back to bed, Ab and I took a trip to Wal*Mart, had a late dinner, and she finally fell asleep just after midnight.

Maybe this means I get to sleep in tomorrow? We shall see! One more day then I'm off to work again :(

Hope you all enjoyed your weekend as well!

Happy Weekend

I am very sad to say that I am quitting the 365 project. I tried very hard to talk myself out of it, and to just "okay, you can do it. you'll be happy you did it"..but I can't. Blogging is something I enjoy doing at my convenience. And even after a short couple weeks, it was quickly becoming a chore rather than a fun hobby. It would instantly feel stressed out if I realized I had missed a day and it just was starting to seem more like work than fun..and thats not what blogging is for me. Sorry. It seemed fun at first, but its just too big of a commitment for a busy gal like me :D

So, what have I been up to? Enjoying marvelous days off work of course!

Thursday my little baby brother turned 8 years old. I still remember 8 years ago so clearly, sitting at harbor hospital with my Grandma and close family, patiently awaiting my sweet little brothers arrival. Sometimes it still feels like yesterday. Happy birthday, Jacob! Sissy loves you!

Friday Ab had her well baby check up! She's doing great as usual. Doc still says she's tall and skinny and I'm still trying to figure out how the heck that happened! Poor girl got two big shots in her legs, they made her limp for a whole 24 hours. Poor baby girl!

Abby and I ran some errands together in the morning, had lunch at Grandma's and came home for a nap. Later, we met Nicole, baby Christian, and Jackie at the Cheesecake Factory but never got to eat due to fussy babies, ha ha. Jackie and I settled with Pizza Hut carry out, we took Ab back home and hung around the house with Jake, Chelsea, and Ryan.

I say this all the time, but my absolute best and favorite past time is sitting up all night long with Jackie. Honestly, its the perfect pick me up when I need one. Lounging on my couch in front of the laptop, tv, or whatever else our entertainment is at the time is always so much fun for some reason. We had heart to hearts about ex boyfriends and past relationships, laughed like mad at faceinhole.com & disorting our faces on cameroid.com, and gossiped about anything and everything. I'm so lucky to have such an awesome best friend!

Today Ab and I lounged around the house for the morning/afternoon. We had scrambled eggs for breakfast and cuddled and watched sprout for a while together. We took an afternoon bath and played peek a boo in her Dora tent. We took a quick trip to Wal Mart with Jake and then Abby spent the evening with Meme so Mama and Dada could go to dinner!

Me, Jake, Jackie, and Whitney went to Dicks Last Resort downtown. Yes, us girls drug Jake out with us, he he. The food sucked, but we had so much fun!

After dinner we picked Ab up and came home for bedtime. It was a quick jump to bed for baby girl, she had been working on no nap all day long!

Currently? I am suffering from insomnia. I am exhausted, but I can't fall asleep and it is so frustrating! My head and ears hurt too, wah :(

I love being off work though. Lucky for me I still have two whole days off to enjoy!!

Just realized this post has zero pictures of Abby. So, heres one just because she's cute :)

Happy weekend!

Catching up

Sorry that I suck!! In my defense I have been working for 4 days straight (twelve hour shifts let me remind you!) and that's why I have not been updating my 365! Without further ado, here they are.

10/365. A day in the PACU. Friday, Jan. 14th 2011.

That is all I see all day long when I'm in the PACU. Monitors going off, beeping like crazy. Its insane! Work wise, it wasn't a terrible day at all though. I love working there and I love my co-workers. All other things considered? It was a stressful day. Jake had to come all the way up work to bring my renewed tags (thank god that is finally taken care of) but he also took me to get Wendy's for a very late lunch :) I found out that the place we were going to rent for our mini vacation in June wouldn't rent to us when I told her our ages, which was infuriating. Completely infuriating. Then I had to pick up Abby from my Grandma, and she cried when she had to leave which broke my heart. THEN! Jake was out with friends and ignored my phone calls all night, which needless to say lead to a very tired me causing a very big fight! I was happy to crawl into bed that night for sure.

11/365. A day from Hell. Saturday, Jan. 15th 2011.

Saturday started off terrible. I rolled over in the morning and stretched, looked out the window to see it was light outside. I panicked, jumped up and checked the time - 8:57am. I was supposed to be at work two hours ago. Shit. I rushed to get ready, gave a quick kiss to my sleepy boyfriend, and bolted out the door. As I'm sprinting out to my car, I notice a tow truck guy. Then I notice, my car is hooked to the back of it. "UMM EXCUSE ME! WHAT ARE YOU DOING! THATS MY CAR! WHY ARE YOU TOWING IT!" and he said that my tags were dead. Shit. We forgot to put them on my car last night. "No, there not. I have the new tags right here" and he said that it didn't matter, that they weren't displayed on my vehicle and that he was towing it. I was about to cry when Jake came running down the steps (he had herd my loud mouth lol) and he argued with him, but the guy said he didn't care that he was still taking my car! So I let the police get involved (we got the coolest cop EVER) and the tow truck finally said he'd drop my car but he was still going to charge me $150. Oh, AND before I left the house there was a note on our door saying that Jake and I were summoned to court for not paying the rent for the month of January. Um, the rent was paid a day early, as it always is. People were just out to get me this weekend I swear! I finally got to work around 11 (4 hours late) and thank god my work day was semi easy. On a happier note: my uncle said that we could have our mini vacation in June at his place for super cheap! Woo hoo. Can not WAIT.

12/365. Newborn babies. Sunday Jan 16th 2011.

I got to work in the postpartum unit on Sunday! I tell you, this is a really great place to go for some good ole baby fever! I got to hold and love little tiny newborns and get to know their mama's. Makes for a GREAT day! I'd still rather work with adults, but being able to come here every once in a while is a nice and relaxing change.

13/365. Last day.

Monday truly was another day from hell. And that picture describes how I felt all day long. I had to sit with a patient who was completely spaced out. I received my first battle wound from a patient that day. Thats all I have to say about that, lol.

14/365. A quick day off.

Tuesday was a sleepy day. I was exhausted from working all weekend and didn't feel like doing much. Abby and I hung out on the couch and played with toys, read books, and watched sprout. I threw together some home made mac and cheese for dinner, along with some yummy home made chicken nuggets. I find it funny that some quick and simple like this was "the greatest dinner ever" according to Jake, and yet the dinners that I spend hours slaving over are just "okay".

15/365. Back to work

I wanted to cry when my alarm went off at 6am. I could not get out of bed, for the life of me..I could NOT get out of bed! It was a long and sleepy day but I made it out of there at 8pm and crawled into bed with Jake and Abs :) She slept so good last night too! :D

Okay..sorry that all those posts suck. I've been so busy!! We just got home from Abs check up, she is napping and I'm so relieved that I'm finally caught up!! I will be back tonight :) Later!

Crazy girl in the tent! 9/365

I love her. She is SO silly in this tent! This was right before bath time after dinner tonight. She was playing with Daddy and flipped it over!

Today involved a little bit (okay - a lot) of panicking, sleeping in, visiting with friends, yummy dinners, and loving my boyfriend.

Panicking: Abby needed diapers, so we headed out to CVS to stock up on some pampers. I was pulling out of our parking spot and noticed a sticker on my rear window. I got out to check it out, and it was a parking violation - a note saying that my car would be towed at their convince and at my expense. What the hell? I turned around to make sure that I hadn't pulled into a handicapped spot by accident last night, but I hadn't. I looked a little closer and quickly found the issue. My tags. Long story short: In July I got a parking ticket. It got forgotten about, and the $50 ticket went up to $150, we payed it. My tags come up for renewal, they won't let me renew them because they claim they never received the payment for the parking ticket that was taken care of MONTHS ago. It has been a total pain in the ass, but my mom and I *thought* we had it all figured out - until I got this damn note this morning! Needless to say, my heart was racing, about to have a heart attack when I finally got in touch with my mom and turns out we can FINALLY go pick up my renewed tags tomorrow. In the mean time, lets just hope the tow truck guy stays clear of my car. Yikes!

Sleeping in: Abby slept in until 1pm today! Only I would have a child who sleeps like this, I swear! She *has* to be going through some major growth spurt or something. She got up at 5am, and considering she wouldn't go to bed until midnight last night - I was like, um no way child! & got her back to sleep - thank goodness! She woke up again around 8, and I changed her diaper, was about to start breakfast when she said "Baba, pacie, night-nights!" and rubbed her eyes, so I thought what the heck, worth a try and laid her back down. The kid slept until 1pm! How did I get so lucky!!

Visiting with friends: Nicole and Christian came to visit us today!

Christian was grumpy and Abby actually ended up falling asleep again (crazy kid!) so we didn't get to do too much, but its always good to see them!

Yummy dinners: I made the BEST dinner tonight. To me anyways, ha ha. Jake isn't a huge fan of Mexican and cheesy things. Me on the other hand? I could eat it all day long!

Creamy chicken enchiladas! I got the recipe over at I ♥ Naptime! I love her blog! Not only was it super yummy but it was so easy to make! I followed her instructions exactly, only I used pre cooked grilled chicken strips which I shredded up to save time! I also used whole grain tortillas and low fat cream cheese in hopes of making it a little less fattening, lol.

Loving my boyfriend: I love him. I simply just love him. I don't know what it is with this new year, but my heart has been filled with so much love lately. I'm not sure why, but I'm not complaining! My heart literally feels so full when I'm with him, like its growing in sizes! I have been feeling this way towards him and Abby both lately. Its like falling in love with both of them all over again, its amazing (not that ever stopped loving either of them, its just for some reason I just want to go scream at the top of my lungs HEY YOU! I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND AND MY DAUGHTER SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!).

And the next couple days I will not be seeing much of my girl, and for that I am sad. I have to work for the next 4 days! :( Tomorrow my Grandma asked to spend some extra time with her, and since I'll be working until 9 and I'm sure Jake wouldn't mind being able to take a nap, I agreed to let her stay at her house most of the day tomorrow. I will get to go pick her up and bring her home and get her ready for bed and then I'll be off again Saturday morning. Saturday I won't get to see her at all! :( I will be out the door before she's up and she's having a sleepover with my mom that night. Earlier this week my mom had asked me if Abby could come over and spend the night this weekend, and I said yes not thinking or realizing that I'd be at work all weekend. Jake said he wants to take me out on a date though, so for that I am excited :)

Dinner with the girls 8/365

just realized i forgot to add the tag at the corner of the pic. oops!

Tonight Abby and I had dinner out with the girls! We met Jackie and Whitney at Cheeseburger in Paradise, and to my surprise..our friends Jessica, Jillian, and Sarah were there too! Three of my best girls from high school that I haven't seen much of since. It was so nice to catch up and laugh about old times together. All of us are getting a house in Ocean City the first week of June, watch out! Its going to be a blast!

Besides our night out to dinner, our day was pretty relaxing. I spent the morning deep cleaning out kitchen while Abby played with her toys and books. We took a quick trip to Target for coffee creamer and milk, and I locked us out of the apartment! I'm shocked it took 10 months for this to happen, lol. Luckily the rental office was still open and they were able to let me back in. Thank god!

I'm not sure whats in store for us tomorrow. Jake has work and school all day long, so I think I'm going to convince Nicole and baby Christian to come over for a play date! See you then!

7/365. Work, work, work.

Well this is the first time I've done a 365 picture a day late, and I'm sure on working days (which yesterday was) that will happen often. Sorry!

Up there is my work. The place you often hear me complain about. I spent 13 hours of my day there yesterday! Woo!

It wasn't a terrible day. Busy, but thats the norm around there. It always decides to snow on my work days, so needless to say my car was an inch deep by 8 o'clock when I went out there to move it from the roof of the garage. Which is when I realized I don't have an ice scraper, which lead to me breaking a lid off a box of wipes in my backseat to use. Worked quite well may I add!

I was a big baby about driving home in the snow but I made it, safe and sound :)

I didn't get home until almost 11, I was super happy to see that baby girl was still awake! We played and had a late night snack together and she finally passed out around midnight. I stayed up for another hour to watch the season premiere of Teen Mom 2 (which I totally love) and then crawled into my warm bed with Jake.

I'll be back tonight for part 8 of 365 :)

Dinner at Goppy's work. 6/365

I was a silly mama and forgot my camera. So for my 6/365, I had to settle with a crappy camera phone picture. Sorry!

But thats my girl! Having a grilled cheese for dinner at Goppy's (the hideous new name has made up for my mom, ha ha) work! Although most of her food ended up on the floor and stuck to our hair, we had a nice time! Jake had crab soup and wings (his usual) and I got blacked chicken with mushrooms, delicious! (and also healthy :p)

Before dinner we had been out house hunting, and I think we have found a winner! I am SO excited. We wanted to be able to buy, but since Jake still has another year of school left and we don't have too much money saved up we're probably going to end up having to rent for another year or so :/

I was bummed at first, but SO happy now because we have found something totally cute and in our price range! Its just a little 2 bedroom town home but um, its not an apartment and I will have a YARD. A little one, but its a yard. Much better than having to walk down three flights of steps to get some fresh air if I want some. We don't even have a balcony at our current place! I'm so excited and I wish it would be March already so 1. this cold weather would be almost OVER and 2. so we can get the ball rolling towards a new place! Woo hoo!

Back to work tomorrow but I don't mind because I'm in working in the PACU and I don't have to be there until 9! Woop woop. I totally do mind that its supposed to start snowing its @ss off around noon though. Yikes! Always on the days that I have to work. Always. I am SO ready for spring.

Sunday Dinner. 5/365

I pretty much suck at cooking dinner. Its not that I'm a bad cook, or that I don't like cooking..because I do. I just never do it. Laziness I guess? Its so much *easier* to get carry out or to pull something out of the freezer and heat it up.

I wish that I cooked more. To get on a better track of doing so, I've devoted every Sunday to dinner making. Hopefully I'll do more than that..but I'm starting out at least trying every Sunday! Hopefully I'll stick to it.

My apologies for another boring picture. Jake really isn't as miserable as he looks, I promise. & Yes, our table is over crowded and yes we stayed in jammies all day and yes that is a cheetah bra hanging from my chair. Sigh. Someday I will be organized.

Anyways: dinner tonight was okay. Had better, had worse. I tried this honey mustard chicken glaze and it wasn't wonderful, I probably won't make it again. The garlic bread and corn was yummy though!

Sundays for us are usually always lazy. Jake and Abby let me sleep in! Instead of bathing and getting into our clothes for the day..we slipped right back into fresh jammies. We all cuddled on the couch, watched football, and Sam and Chance came over and played with Abby.

Big plans bright and early with Nicole and baby Christian tomorrow. Stay tuned :)

4/365 - A quick snap.

This was the first time I had an "oh shoot. i have to take a picture today" moment for my 365 project. While I managed to miss a great photo opportunity at Michael's while Abby was playing with face masks, and when I kangaroo'd her in my sweater and RAN to Starbucks because it was super freezing outside, or the sweetest moments IN Starbucks when Abby was sitting in my lap and leaning on my chest eating apple slices and animal crackers while I sipped my white mocha.(<- totally an "omg I love being a Mommy" moment).

I did however..snap a GREAT picture of Jackie and I after having some sushi at the Asian Buffet.

Really great, eh? Um, my eyes are blood shot and I'm the most pale I have ever been in my whole life. Yuck.

The Asian Buffet was very much enjoyable though. We met Jake, Chelsea, Ryan, Sam and Chance there and I stuck to my diet very well! Water, salad, and sushi was my dinner. Go me! Abby however, decided it was okay to take handfuls of fried rice off of every one else's plates. Lol.

Speaking of food, Abby has been eating and sleeping like a CHAMP lately! Considering the kid eats 4 or 5 HUGE meals a day (plus snacks) and taking 4-5 hour naps. I'll go out on a limb and say she's going through a growth spurt!

After dinner every one came back to our place and we attempted to watch a movie but the boys wouldn't stop talking about dirt bikes and 4wheelers so we ended up just hanging around and gossiping, the usual.

I snuggled my sweet baby to bed and did some late night grocery shopping at Wal*Mart where I continued my diet and got some really healthy food! Yes!

Hope you all are enjoying your weekend as well!

At Home First Aid Kit

Check to see that your home first-aid kit is complete.

Is it bad that we don't have an actual "first aid kit"? American Red Cross says you should have this stuff. This is what were are currently still lacking. Bold is what we don't have and need to get.

• 2 absorbent compress dressings (5 x 9 inches)
• 25 adhesive bandages (assorted sizes)
• 1 adhesive cloth tape (10 yards x 1 inch)
• 5 antibiotic ointment packets (approximately 1 gram)
• 5 antiseptic wipe packets
• 2 packets of aspirin (81 mg each)
• 1 blanket (space blanket)
• 1 breathing barrier (with one-way valve)
• 1 instant cold compress
• 2 pair of nonlatex gloves (size: large)
• 2 hydrocortisone ointment packets (approximately 1 gram each)
• Scissors
• 1 roller bandage (3 inches wide)
• 1 roller bandage (4 inches wide)
• 5 sterile gauze pads (3 x 3 inches)
• 5 sterile gauze pads (4 x 4 inches)
• Oral thermometer (non-mercury/nonglass)
• 2 triangular bandages
• Tweezers
• First aid instruction booklet

Yikes! Looks like we've got some catching up to do.

A Perfect Mess. 3/365

Today..has just been a mess. A complete and total mess. I pulled my first all nighter of 2011 last night. Currently I have been awake for over 30 hours, please bare with me.

If you can look past our feet and see the background, you can see a half ripped paper grocery bag, an abandoned pacifier, a huge stack of diapers, some random clothing items, and Jake's hunting tree stand tipped over. Oh, and you don't have too look too closely to notice that my toe nail polish is chipped and that Jake's jeans are still dirty from his day at work.

But yet...its perfect. Its perfect because sometimes perfection is just not giving a shit that your apartment is a disaster, that your still in your work clothes 5 hours after quitting time, that your toes are practically begging you for a pedicure and your toddler's nickname is mas-destruction.

I love my life, on good days..and on bad days. I was running on schedule (for once) this morning but my Grandma was not (for once) and I ended up being late to work anyways. There was a light dusting of snow on the ground but somehow it made all drivers of Maryland think they were driving in a damn blizzard.

And speaking of bad drivers? Just so that you are aware: Yield means YIELD, if there are no cars..GO! you do not need to count to three Mississippi's, it is not a stop sign. Second of all, mid-day at a hospital most parking garages are jam packed. There is going to be zero parking on the first, second, and yes even the THIRD level so speed the fuck up and stop looking looking in every nook and cranny for a parking spot BECAUSE YOUR NOT GOING TO FIND ONE, hurry up and get to the roof to save us all 15 minutes.

So yes, obviously it has been one of those days. & Even though I am pale as all hell and I had to scrub my body from head to toe when I walked through the door tonight before I could touch Abby (worked with RSV babies all day, yikes) I have her now. And I missed her today. We are going to cuddle and I am going to bed.

Did this make any sense at all!? Hope so! My apologies if not.

Happy Friday.

An at home work out attempt.

I'm more of a gym person. I have a hard time getting motivated to work out at home. But..obviously, with a full time job and baby I don't always have the time to make it to the gym.

I had a late cup of coffee this evening and took a late nap with Abby, I had some extra energy to burn off so I decided to try a variety at home work outs to see if there was something I liked. Considering I just spent the past two hours working out, I'd say it was pretty accomplishing!

I tried a number of work outs off of the Exercise TV section on On Demand. Unfortunately, I am not very coordinated. It is challenging for me to watch someone on TV do a work out routine and follow it, lol. If I know it in my head - sure, I can do it..no problem. But when I don't know the routine by heart..I can't watch and do at the same time, ha ha. I suck.

With that said, out of the 5ish routines I tried, my most favorite was "Fit in your jeans by Friday" by Kim Kardashian. I also really enjoyed the "Crunch" series. They were both girly and enjoyable. Making it easy to follow along..which is obviously a huge necessity to me!

All in all I still don't think TV work out sessions are for me. Maybe a quick 10 minute ab or arms, but no huge routine. Not my thing.

What I did like? Just doing my own thing. I played music videos from On Demand and did a certain exorcise for the length of the video. Example: I did right and left leg lifts for the length of the "Lets get it started - Black eyed peas" video, and squats for the length of the "Hips Don't Lie - Shakira" video. Seems to be working pretty well for now!

I still prefer the gym more, but finding something to do when I'm not able to make it there is exciting :)

A goal.

I think every single girl in the whole wide world has a goal of loosing weight, or being more "toned". I am one of those girls. Always wanting to eat better, always wanting to loose just five more pounds, always wishing I could be a jean size smaller..always being jealous of all the skinny girls in bikinis every summer, always wishing I could just feel confident about my body.

But thats the problem - I'm just wishing. I never actually do anything about it. So this year (like every other year, lol) I really want to do it. I will feel better about myself and I think I'd be a happier person in general.

My motivation? Vacation. We will take our family vacation like we do every year, but theres something else in the line up for the summer of 2011. The grown ups are taking a 4 day get-a-way and I am SO excited. But I want to be in good shape for it. Considering most of our friends don't have babies, they have pretty rockin' bods..well, I want to be right there with them this year! I am determined! I will blogging my progress and weight loss.

Last vacation with the girls, 2008. Weight: 115

Pre-pregnancy weight, 2009: 125

Current weight: 128

Goal weight: 110

(please keep in mind that I am only 5'0. 110 is an acceptable and healthy weight for someone of my height!)

Stay Tuned! :D

Daily Challenge Day #5

Go credit-card free today.

Easy. I don't use one anyways :p

2/365 - Storyville.

Today we took a mini road trip to a place I have been hearing about for quite a while now, Storyville. Its a learning center for preschool aged children about 40 minutes from our house. It was worth the little trip that it was! Abby had a great time. They had a mini kitchen and "house" with a little garden, it had a pretend grocery store with a mail station, a "theater", and so much more! Despite the fact that we got stuck in traffic for a half hour on the way there and I had a mini heart attack because I didn't know where we were at and it was getting dark - we made it, and we had fun. Its some place we will definitely be visiting again soon!

For now..it is six minutes until the season premiere of Jersey Shore! Jake and I are popping popcorn and patiently awaiting its arrival. Back to work tomorrow, see you then!

Daily Challenge Day #4 and a New Project!

Share a favorite healthy breakfast idea.

My Absolute favorite healthy breakfast is a fruit/granola parfait. Low fat yogurt, fruit, and some crunched up granola (not too much because its usually cooked in lots of sugar!) and its delicious! I get it at work all the time. My favorite kind is peach flavored yogurt with strawberries and raspberries :)

Okay, so about this new project of mine. Who's up for a 365!?

My friend made me aware of this awesome idea. to capture a picture every single day and tell its story for a whole year. 365 days, 365 pictures, 365 stories to tell. How much fun does that sound!? I wasn't going to do it at first since I don't have my dream camera yet, but she encouraged me to do it anyways and sent me a really great blog who did it, the one where she originally got the idea from.

I'm excited about it! So without further ado..here is 1/365. Babies at play.

Out of half guiltiness for not having Abby around other babies enough and half of a sad heart for missing one of my best friends - Nicole and I got the babies together today! I can't believe how much Christian has grown and changed since the last time I saw him, which was only a little over a month ago! Abby is quiet with kids, I have realized. She quietly played with him and patted him on the shoulder and called him "baby". I asked her to say Christian, and she called him something that sounded like "Corupt". She did share her pacies very well though! Silly girl.

We decided to take a stroll around the mall just to get out of the house. We were so deep in conversation that we lapped around the whole mall twice (its a circle, and a mile around exactly - so we did two miles!) and didn't even realize it. We ate burger king (epic fail at my diet numero uno) and I bought Abby her bathing suit for this summer! SUPER excited.

Jake has been working lots of overtime and I have not been seeing to much of him at all which I am super bummed about. After this week, he will be back on his normal schedule and I am very much looking forward to having his studly self around more often!

Happy Hump Day!

I love her.

Lately I have had this overwhelming love for Abby. Obviously I always have crazy heart wrenching love for her, but for some reason the past day or two its like a rush of having her all over again. Its like we're on a brand new level of mommy-hood/baby-hood. We are best friends, we can communicate now, and I love it. I love her. I love her. I love her. I love her. Just had to get that out there today.

We went to our first "baby gym" class today. I'm kicking myself in the butt for not taking the camera! I didn't know if would be okay to have it, but turns out lots of Mama's were snappin pics. Oh well :(

We had so much fun! It was interesting to see her personality bloom around other kids her age. She was a little bit shy, but eventually opened up and had fun. She kept to herself mostly and was very concentrated on her surroundings. She loved the slides and tried to steal balls from all the other babies :p It was pretty obvious that she's not around other babies too much, making me feel a little guilty. Almost makes the ridiculous monthly price seem worth it. I do think this particular class may have been a little young for her though. She was one of the older babies there and she was NOT interested in sitting my lap and singing songs and clapping her hands. My baby wanted to explore. She did really love the big parachute though. All the Mama's held the edges and all the babies crawled/ran around in the middle. She cried when they put it away!

Tonight before bedtime I was just giddy over my love for her. We had dinner together (mac and cheese with hot dogs!) and she ate a ton! My girl finally got her appetite back! I am SO happy and SO relieved because I swear the kid was getting skinnier on me. We played after we ate in her ball pit. She is SO cute. We played peek-a-boo through the little holes on the wall of the tent and she laughed sooo hard the whole time. She squished her face and made a piggy nose on the clear plastic part and I laughed SO hard. Oh, and she pretends to sleep now. She lays down on her belly and kicks her feet behind her and pretends to snore. It is HILARIOUS! She knows I think its funny so she did it about 50 times tonight, and I laughed just as hard each time :)

After our bedtime bath I combed her cute little curls that I am SO excited about her getting, rubbed Johnson's bedtime lotion onto her pudgy little baby skin and clipped her little baby finger nails. She cuddled on the couch with me and snacked on her apple cinnamon puffs. Eventually I laid her little self to sleep and wanted to cry watching her lay there because I just adore her. Simply adore her. She is awesome.

Some where between here and there I also cleaned my car and got my oil changed. Yay me! Considering I've never taken my car to get its oil changed one single time (Jake or my Dad has always done it) it was a pretty big deal for me :p And I even got the lady to take off an extra $5! Whatever they did stopped the annoying squeaking my car was making, thank god. Now I just need to get a bumper!

In other news, I just back from the gym. For the second night in a row, yay me again! New year, new me..right? Haha, I say this every year. We'll see how long it lasts! I'm not totally uncomfortable with my body but I could be a lot happier, so for once in my whole life I'd like to feel okay in a bathing suit this summer. Last summer I was 8 months postpartum (didn't look TOO terrible) and the summer before that I was 30 weeks pregnant. This year? It will be almost two years since I'd given birth. I have no excuse anymore. I need to get back in shape!

I bought a huge tub of cottage cheese and I'm trying to eat more of that, more water, and make more home cooked healthy meals. Wish me luck!

Changing a negative to a positive.

Me you health daily challenge. Day #3: Turn a negative to a positive.

Find time today to reflect on something negative that happened recently which is still upsetting you. Are there any lessons to be learned from the experience? Is there something you could do differently next time to get a different outcome? A good time to do this exercise is during your commute to or from work or school, on a walk, or any other time that's quiet when you can be alone with your thoughts.

Something that has been bothering me: the year 2010 in general. With all this reflecting going on in general, I've been realizing that it wasn't an awesome year. We had a really stressful and frustrating first couple of months of 2010 living with and moving out of Jake's Mom's, then the two of had a hard time adjusting to being a couple out on our own. Hard enough that at times I wasn't sure if we were going to make it.

It makes me sad because I have wonderful memories from the year as well. Watching Abby grow up, spending time with her, growing into a Mama, having great memories with my friends..but it always seems like the bad things out weigh the good. I want to remember the good.

How is this positive? Because it opens my eyes. Opens my eyes and makes me see that the good really does out weigh the bad, you just have to want to see things that way. This positively has given me a new outlook for 2011. It feels good. Like breathing in a gush of fresh air.

Needless to say, Jake and I have matured over the past year and have finally found a happy middle for us. It was hard. Being 19 and 21. Parents. And moving into an apartment with not a ton of money. It took us awhile, along with a lot of tears and lots of late night talks..but we did it. I have never felt so at peace with him, ever in my life.

Jake is very organized, I am not. It used to really frustrate him when I would loose my car keys or lock myself out of the house..causing terrible fights. But, he's accepting it more these days...and I'm accepting his advice on how to be more organized more rather than less. Me? I wear my emotions on my sleeve. Him? He'd rather not talk about it and go for a drive by his self. That used to really bother me. I craved for a tear, a fighting word, a hug, an it will be okay, ANYTHING..but I never got it. I have learned to be okay with this, and that he talks when he is ready. We are different. But we are working it out. After all, opposites attract, right?

So! 2011. Get ready. Jake and I are fresh and ready to take you on head first. Having such a struggling year as a couple has only made us stronger. We have learned so much about each other, which was hard at first, but in the end has only made us more compatible together. We are in love and have a beautiful little toddler who keeps us happy every single day regardless the circumstances. Hooray! :D

A year in review

1. Me

Picture of yourself (you don't have to show your face). What are you most proud of accomplishing in 2010?

I am proud of my daughter. She is only 15 months, but I absolutely adore the sweet, loving, funny, shy, and silly little girl she is becoming.

2. I love you

Picture of your husband, boyfriend, children, pets, etc.

3. Still Laughing...

A moment you're still laughing about now...tell us a story.

4th of July. Nakie baby in the pool. Enough said. Needless to say she was the life of the party..

4. Winter Wonderland

A picture that reflects Winter.

5. Birthday

Share a birthday picture (your own or someone you love).

6. Friends

A picture with friends (this could be your friends or your children with their friends).

I did my own friends instead of Abby's because I have realized how truly amazing mine really are this past year. This picture is missing some though!

7. I was in Inspired

Could be a picture of your inspiration (person or thing), or inspired by...

One of the very few good pictures I've been able to take with my lame little camera. I don't know why it inspires me...but it just does. Inspires me to take more good pictures someday? Haha. It just reminds me of laughing and having fun and summer. Three of my favorite things :)

8. Spring Fever

A picture that reflects Spring.

9. Travel

A picture taken on vacation or on a recent travel experience, OR of a place you'd like to travel.

10. Summer Days

A picture that reflects Summer.

11. A day in my life

A picture of a typical day in your life.

12. All Smiles

A picture that makes you smile or of smiling faces.

13. Autumn Harvest

A picture that reflects Autumn/Fall.

14. Family

A picture of your family or a picture that represents family for you.

15. Celebrate!

A picture that reflects a celebration.

16. Lets do it again!

A picture of something you'd like to do again soon.

The holidays are over. Now the cold is just boring and depressing. I'm looking forward to sinking my feet into a pool under some warm sun again very soon!

17. I miss you

A picture of someone or something you really miss

My Nana. I just saw her on Christmas, but it seems like lately every time I see her its for a family gathering and we have no time to talk. I want a sofa sitting, face stuffing, up till 4am catching up session asap Nana!

18. Beautiful

A picture of someone or something you find beautiful.

19. Dress Up

This might be a picture from Halloween or not...but someone who is all dressed up!

20. Holidays

A picture from the Holiday of your choice.

22. My Favorite

Share your favorite picture or memory from 2010.

23. Don't ever change

Something you love about yourself, someone, or something that you never want to change.

Our relationship.

24. Just because..so there!

Share any picture(s) that you really want to share, but doesn't fit in any other category.

Oh my goodness. Isn't she just the cutest? I love this picture. Strolling around Old Navy in my favorite boots and hat! With two of my favorite people as well, Daddy and Auntie Jackie!

25. Hopes and Dreams

Share what you hope to come or dream for 2011. Feel free to share an image of your choice.

More time for us just being us. I hope for a relaxing, fun, and calm year for the three of us!